- "All white meat" Chicken McNuggets. Those delectable dark ones were the only ones that made ingesting a batch of those things semi-tolerable.
- Crackhead neighbors who at times come to your door late at night to "borrow" a mere thin strip of aluminum foil, because they say they're (once again) "baking chicken". Yo meth-head, would you like a straw and a torch-lighter to go with that too? Wouldn't want you to ruin your "chicken".
- Having honest flirty fun with a good woman, only to have others step in and somehow apply the "Scarlet W" to her, on account of what I myself have been primarily instigating.
- Lifetime unemployed downstairs neighbors on permanent welfare who publicly chastise you, and instruct you not to run your water late at night because it interferes with their shower. Yo asshole, that was me taking a bath, because I have to get up in the morning and go to work so that you can continue receiving your welfare benefits. At least you have 24 hours out of your meaningless day to choose from to take your shower. Just for that I'm gonna switch my laundry schedule around, run all my hot water loads on weeknights after taking my bath; then run the dryer for 90 minutes after I go to bed. Then for good measure, I'm gonna run the dryer on the last load for another 90 minutes when I leave first thing in the morning. Effin' douchebag.
- My money in someone elses hands.
- Paul ain't dead! Quit fuckin' with my head!
- When a woman takes it upon herself to "tidy up" your house "a bit" while you're not there. Yo, yo, yo. If I wanted a maid, I'd pay for one.
- When somebody deletes your comment, because they just don't understand your humor. It's flavorful; just take it for what it is. That goes double for you jackasses who are commenting to yourselves right now. You know who you are.
- That lowdown thieving POS who somehow boosted my $220 Shure Beta 87A condenser vocal microphone right out of my equipment bag while I was performing. I have video of everyone that was there that night. You best keep your mouth shut, and hope to God I don't find out who you are.
Your station for all misanthropy, all the time.
Dub'
- 1/3 lb. "gourmet" burger joints. They ain't all that. Merely an expensive snack; I make and dress bigger burgers at home.
- Burger joints that charge for extra condiments.
- Cold wind and cold rain on June 8th.
- Commuters who complain about missing a bus, because it arrived 5 minutes early. Yo Einstein, first lesson in Bus Riding 101 - don't wait till the last minute, and read the fine print on the bus schedules. Try getting their 10 minutes early and you'll always be covered; whether the previous one is 5 minutes late, or the next one is 5 minutes early.
- Deep fried oysters. They're otherwise yummy; but there's the prospect of nuclear-hot oyster juice beneath the surface of the breading, just waiting to be released somewhere upon your face.
- Helping someone who needs a "quick favor" on a beautiful weekend day by helping to go pick up a free playhouse for their kid; and finding out it weighs 600 lbs., is 12 feet tall, and you spend the rest of the day dismantling it board by board, just so you can offload it from the truck.
- And while we're on the subject, paying (out of your pocket) the driver the 30 bucks needed for his delivery and gas needs, and an additional 30 bucks for 1/2 inch rope to secure the monstrous playhouse - and still not getting paid back yet. That's a hell of a favor for a "free" playhouse.
- NBA playoff hype. Who the hell cares? The NBA is lame; I'd rather watch hockey.
- Speculators who somehow see their way past my disclaimer. Yeah! You made it for certain into my blog this time! Now remember… "meant for entertainment".
- This damn bleach hi-lighted double mohawk. Blatantly ridiculous. I'm pushing 50 for chrissakes; not 15. It's gotta go...
Your station for all misanthropy, all the time.
Dub'
- An organization known as "San Diego Rock to Stop Violence" seeking to raise funds, by auctioning off a signed Muhammed Ali boxing glove.
- From the "Surely Sexualizing Young Women Has Never Led to Violence" Dept.: While we're on the subject, the same organization objectifying and sexualizing anorexic-looking young women, by holding an "open model casting" at the same benefit.
- A young mother with overly-active tykes, taking them to McDonald's in the hopes of tiring them out, and readying them for a nap. "Here, eat your breaded processed chicken parts dipped in high fructose corn syrup, drink your soda, and go play in the balls." That should do the trick.
- An overly outspoken teenage boy who publicly dishes dirt on everyone, instructing somebody on his Facebook page to "stop snitching".
- A disgraced cheater, referring to the women now interested in her ex, as "whores".
- Anthony Weiner. No explanation necessary.
- Conservative columnists advocating limitations on freedom of speech and expression, who are paid by organizations whose very existences are owed to freedom of speech.
Dub'
- A mutually and eagerly anticipated first date, which becomes a lesson in the realization that scores and scores of countless Facebook pokes just can't replace chemistry.
- Awkward social situations that you're expected to take part in, when you'd rather not.
- Being a nice guy, when you'd rather not be.
- Citing biblical scripture within the exact context in which it was authored, and then being told by a religious person that you're citing it out of context, because it doesn't fit within the dogmatic preconception which they were trained to accept without question in the first place.
- Last nights grocery bill. I know I indulged in a 6-pack of Hornsby's Hard Cider; but how the hell did I spend 35-40 bucks more than usual, and come home with less?
- Men who gloat at a poker table. That should be Man Commandment #11. Men who do this should be severely bitch-slapped.
- Neurotic women who let others corral them into things they wouldn't otherwise do, and then want you there as some sort of rock to fall back on when the music's over - when they could have just fucking said "NO" to begin with. Yo, you're sweet; but I don't do that gig anymore. Chalk it up to experience; apparently you needed some. Now take a Prozac.
- While being surrounded in a virtual sea of women, the one you would choose, and are most compatible with needing to keep you at an occasional arms distance. Schopenhauer nailed it.
- That the only way I can foresee getting my son to do his dishes is by giving him a stack of paper plates, and a garbage can.
- Those who manage to live rent free, and still somehow think that household chores should be distributed equally. Are you fucking kidding me?
Your station for all misanthropy, all the time.
Dub'
- Looking for your favorite summer shoes - your bad-ass Vans - and finding out that your son at some point had decided to wear them to work on a day he was painting. Son of a bitch. Oops, did I say that out loud?
- Outspoken Christians who embrace prosperity theology, while simultaneously lecturing others on true core Christian principles.
- Outspoken self-help advocates who incessantly post ad nauseum about, and literally make lucrative careers out of their life as "victims"; and then go on to publicly chastise others for "pointing fingers" and "refusing to move on". WTF? Hypocrite much?
- Losing 5 million dollars in poker over a 3 day bad-run.
- Psycho cheating ex's who still think they have the right to openly critique the women you choose to be with.
- Those who toss their garbage in an ash can, when there's a garbage can 10 feet away.
- Those who toss their garbage in an ash can, when there's a garbage can 10 feet away; and then walk away when the ash can begins to smolder.
- When, in refusing to mince words with people of questionable character, they feign moral outrage. There ain't a damn thing I've uttered which I haven't earned the right to say.
- When your grown son whom you still feed and shelter catches the biggest ling cod on the planet, and decides to share it with his friends instead.
- While your grown son whom you still feed and shelter is enjoying the biggest ling cod on the planet with his friends, you washing his dirty dishes he left stacked for the weekend, so that you can cook something for yourself
- That uneasy feeling you can't quite figure out.
Stay tuned, I feel a bout of misanthropy coming on.
Dub'
- Having to process paperwork for business partners all afternoon on Easter Sunday, because they all decided to wait until the weekend to submit their requests for assistance for paperwork that they needed - TA DA!... on Sunday.
- People, who as if they were talking directly to you, engage in 5 minute detailed conversations with your voicemail system.
- And speaking of which, office voicemail systems that won't allow you to "press 7" until you've listened to the entire message first.
- Being on a date, and having a (now careworn) ex-girlfriend from years ago proposition you to go home with HER; only to realize she's looking for a sucker to pay off her crack debt for the night. Then upon turning her down cold, having her throw the "I thought you were my friend" card. Bitch, are you for real? Sorry, but last time I looked in the mirror, I don't recall seeing the words "fucking gullible dumbass" stenciled on my forehead.
- Mid-May. Still cold; still raining, still dreaming.
- Unrealized selfishness. Others, not your own.
- Receiving a booty-call on a work night, when you've been up for 17 hours; and her not "retiring" for another 6. At my age, that can give the *wrong* impression.
- That the nature of life-systems is such that emotional and physical desires can never truly be fulfilled.
- That much like a dog chasing its own tail, purposefullness is a circular endeavor. What does everybody want; everybody seek? Happiness. What is the one that that most people aren't - even those who are "well off"? Happy. Just stop worrying about it, people. Simply… be.
Been a while; hopefully it will be a while longer...
Dub'
I've decided to inject another element into the blog. One of my favorite subjects; one which I am very passionate about. Food. This is my own recipe, and it came out DAMN GOOD. This medley of flavors is simply phenomenal; and it only takes about an hour to cook.
Ingredients-
6 lbs. of fresh clams (or as many as you want.)
Water, as needed
8 slices thick cut pepper bacon, diced
2 Walla Walla sweet onions, chopped
3 cloves garlic; pressed, or 3 tsp minced garlic
2 stalks celery, diced
2 carrots, peeled and diced.
1 1/2 cups water
4 large Yukon Gold potatoes, peeled and cubed
Salt and McCormick's Worcestershire black pepper, to taste
1 cup quality Sauvignon Blanc
2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
2 tsp hot sauce of choice (such as Tabasco)
1 tbsp thyme
1 tsp dill
1 tbsp cornstarch
1 quart half and half
1 stick of butter
4 tbsp malt vinegar
2 tbsp parsley
- Steam clams in about 2 inches of water, just until clams open. Reserve clam juice; mince clams, and set aside.
- Add enough water, along with the clam juice, to make approx. 1 quart of liquid. Set aside.
- In stock pot, cook diced bacon over medium-high heat until almost crisp.
- Add onions, garlic, celery, and carrots; saute for 5 minutes.
- Stir in 1 1/2 cups water, and potatoes; season with salt and Worcestershire pepper. Bring to a boil, and cook uncovered until potatoes are tender. Note: You may be tempted to add more water here, but do not. It's going to look thick, but it's supposed to be. There will be plenty more liquid to add later.
- Add reserved clam liquid, white wine, Worcestershire, hot sauce, thyme, and dill. Return to a boil. Reduce heat to medium, and simmer about 10 minutes.
- Dissolve cornstarch into the half and half, and stir the mixture into the soup. Add the butter, and stir.
- Add clams, stir occasionally, and cook until it just starts to bubble; but do not allow to boil.
- Reduce heat to low, and cook for 3 minutes, or until lightly thickened.
- Add the vinegar and parsley, and stir in.
- Get your damn grub on.
